I got ditched tonight! I am a bit bummed about it, but am just going to watch lots of food network and try to force myself to wash my dishes. They apparently don’t wash themselves. What bullshit. Stupid dishes. I wonder if I figure out a way to sleep on my tv while episodes of Iron Chef is on if it can be a form of osmosis. I wanna wake up and be able to cook like Zaccharian!
I give really good advice to my friends. Duh.
My friend is considering skipping on church tomorrow to hang with a fella. I told her this: ” God forgives you if you don’t go to church. It is in the bible. He says, ‘Thou must touch doth booty!’ ‘If thou sees a fine and thick posterior and thou neglects it… thou neglects thyself.’ That is another passage from the bible. I think it was one that Sir...
What could my personal Internet sex ad read? I’ve seen my own name mentioned in...– John Waters, Role Models (via racheletc) omg why hasn’t this happened to me yet this is why i got into internet in the first place (via kingstupid) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So many exclamation points! !!!!!!!!!!!!
Anonymous asked: You are adorable and if we had anything in common I would ask you out in a heartbeat. You are just so cute I had to say something.
savevsdeath asked: The Snack Food Association's annual convention probably rules.
Anonymous asked: What was your best okstupid message? The Divine/John Waters message was awesome! I also loved your "meat lover" photo-I get some real winners myself: "Hi, how would you do against me in a wrestling match?" Ewwww! So needless to say, I feel your anguish/pain!
Second best OkStupid Message I have received:
“So is your mother John (Waters) or Divine?” LET’S MAKEOUT!